There were those days when a bad boy would have us drooling, nowadays even the name bad boy sounds so passe..boy? WE WANT A MAN!!
1) I’D RATHER DIE THAN COMMIT DUDE – He wants to do you BUT he just doesn’t want to date you. Labels are to him what garlic is to a vampire and he’s very quick to put you in your spot. He wants to “see” you BUT he just doesn’t want see all of you I guess. Getting him into a relationship will take more patience and concentration than a chess game with Bobby Fischer. Basically, he’s here for a good time & not a long time.
Red Flag : You’ve been seeing each other long enough for him to at least know if he wants to be your boyfriend..for the love of God, it’s just dating not a proposal!
2) SERIAL CHEATER (pervy) MAN – Quick to love & quick to leave. Cheating isn’t a mistake he’s made or even a phase, it’s his way of life. He’s also super pervy, constantly checking everyone out from randos to your friends. Of course he has a good excuse for every time he’s cheated, so save yourself the drama & leave his sorry ass..like yesterday!
Red Flag : When speaking about his past he takes little ownership of having cheated and always try to shift the blame on his exes, clearly he’s learned nothing.
3) DEPENDABLE GUY W. THE PERSONALITY OF A WALL – He has a stable job, he’s had the same friends for 20+ years and he’s looked the exact same for the last 10 years. Change is not his friend, neither is fun. He will never leave you BUT he will bore the hell out of you. Yes he’s consistent but he’s also mediocre in every aspect of his life and most probably in the sack too! If spending prolonged periods of time w him seems like you’re writing an essay about Canadian history, stop settling and let him find his perfectly boring counterpart.
Red Flag : Whether it’s in bed or on a night out, he can’t seem to hold your attention as much as he tries. You can’t force passion.
4) SIR SCREWS A LOT – His bedroom has a higher turnover rate than In-N-Out & yes pun absolutely intended. He has slept with everyone from your neighbor, your friends best friend to that girl who just gave you a pedi. Nothing and no one is safe so hide yo wife, hide yo kids. Despite how guys feel about this, it’s not hot and it’s definitely not a plus. Basically he’s as exclusive as a Hanes T shirt, so hitting that is NO accomplishment.
Red Flag : Everywhere you go y’all run into girls he “knows”, Ok sure guys know girls..but he knows them all. There’s never a good back story either, it’s just a mysterious “Ohhh um yah I know her,” and from what you hear A LOT of girls “know” him too.
5) SERIAL LIAR DUDE – You’ve caught him in a lie more than once, some big and some so small that you can’t even begin to comprehend why he lied to you. Lying is to him what breathing (& shopping) is to us, it just comes naturally! Although his lies haven’t directly hurt you until now, it’s pretty likely that at some point they will. So let his pants burn baby burn.
Red Flag : Every time he tells someone a story he’s already told you, details change and the story gets exaggerated.
6) THE MARRIED GUY W. THE WIFE WHO DOESN’T “GET” HIM – He’s straight heartless, charming and alluring..but heartless! He’ll tell you that you’re the only girl he’s ever done this with and that his wife just doesn’t get him anymore, to keep you hanging on. Truth is you’re probably not the only girl and he will NEVER leave his wife..at least not for you. Marriages are not perfect but to step out every time there are issues, well that just deserves getting stepped on.
Red Flag : He’s got a wife..do I really need to say more?
7) BAD IN BED BOY – Chemistry is something you just can’t fake..now an orgasm, that’s another story. But do you really want to spend the rest of your life faking it or enjoying it? Naturally sex slows down over time and sooner than later you’re bound to run out of holes but bad sex is still bad sex. I don’t think you can teach a guy how to be good in bed, either he is or he isn’t.
Red Flag : He can never hold a girl down and the word around town about his bedroom performance isn’t noteworthy.
8) THE MAN W. ZERO AMBITION – He likes to take it easy..the easy road that is. He will probably never advance in his job and that is perfectly okay with him. It’s not even the fact that he has nothing that is a problem (HAHA) but really the fact that he wants nothing more. He started from the bottom and he will always be there..Oh, Drake!
Red Flag : His lack of motivation shows from the way he takes care of his body to the job he has.
9) LITTLE MAN BOY – He focuses on childish things – his toys, ego & playmates. He refuses to make you his priority and puts his friends on a pedestal. He wants the comforts of a relationship but doesn’t quite want to make the sacrifices a successful relationship requires. If puberty hadn’t taken it’s course he’d still look like a 10 year old, so unless you wanna babysit for free exit before he has a tantrum.
Red Flag : You’re constantly mothering him and drawing boundaries for him. Well, at least you’ll be an expert by the time you have kids.
10) CRAZY AND/OR JEALOUS W. A DASH OF STALKER DUDE – He watches you like a hawk and makes you believe that there’s a direct correlation between his psychosis and his love for you. The mere mention of your ex drives him over the edge and he can go from 0 to 100 in 2 seconds.He tries to control you in any way he can, whether it’s through finances or telling you how to run your life. Point blank he’s insecure but most importantly slightly psychotic.
In all honesty even some great guys will have some of the above traits in them or even a combination of a few, cut them a little bit of slack. Just see what’s truly important to you and what issues you’re willing to compromise on and overlook. However, if he’s any of the above to a T, then he’ll turn you into an unhappy B!